Dance Monkey is new CPR song of choice

It seems almost like an annual occurrence, but the British Heart Foundation have suggested a new song to perform chest compressions to – ‘Dance Monkey’ by Tones & I.

The Australian songstress has already gained worldwide notoriety as the singer of one of the best selling singles of all time. Now she looks set to surpass The Bee Gees ‘Stayin’ Alive’ and also ‘Nelly The Elephant’ as the song to keep a rhythm to in the life or death scenario.

CPR being preformed on a large headed man

A spokesperson from the British Heart Foundation told Da Fake News “We want to keep up to date with modern trends in order to save as many people as possible. ‘Dance Monkey’ was such a huge hit, the last time we looked it had over 945 million views on YouTube, so we felt it was a prefect match for CPR. We didn’t want people spending unnecessary time trying to figure out how The Bee Gees song goes when they should have already begun chest compressions. It could mean the difference between the patient living or dying”.

We tried to contact Tones and I’s record label for a comment but were told to “Piss off”.

Posted by Barrington Lloyd-George

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